The System is Abstract, Luckily, So Am I

Chapter 231 : If You Don't Take It, and I Don't Take It, How Will Commissioner Smith Take It?

"A perfect Tian Ji's horse racing strategy. Wang Yuezhi, this inferior horse, freed me, the superior horse, up. I don't need to waste resources running with Lin Li, this medium horse, and can obtain greater benefits. Class 4 will definitely win!"

When Wang Yuezhi went back to continue jumping the long rope, Wang Ze sighed with emotion.

Lin Li, who had achieved all this through wisdom and charm, closed his eyes and pretended to stroke a beard, looking unfathomable. Then he turned his head, made sure Chen Yuying couldn't hear, and quickly said to Wang Ze:

"I'm a medium horse, give me Tian Ji."

(Translator's Note: A pun on "Tian Ji" which sounds like "sweet chicken" or a similar sexual innuendo).

Wang Ze: "?"

You motherfucker.

"However, I have to admit, this is the wisdom of our ancestors," Lin Li sighed.

"Hehe, I don't think so," Bai Bufan, who was beside them, sneered upon hearing this. "Tian Ji's horse racing can sometimes seem very stupid."

"Oh? Why do you say that, Brother Bai? What's your brilliant opinion?" Lin Li looked at Bai Bufan curiously.

Bai Bufan took a deep breath.

"When I was in third grade, I got into a fight with a classmate. Neither of us would back down, so we arranged a fight. I called my sixth-grade brother, but he brought his eighth-grade brother. So I called my high school freshman cousin, but unexpectedly, he brought his high school senior brother.

"At that time, we thought we were bound to lose. Fortunately, my cousin had already learned the text about Tian Ji's horse racing.

"In the end, it was me, a third-grader, fighting my classmate's high school senior brother."

Bai Bufan's voice was magnetic and deep, seemingly full of stories, stopping abruptly at the last sentence.

Lin Li and Wang Ze laughed until their stomachs hurt.

"What was the result, Bufan?" Lin Li squatted on the ground and asked with a smile.

"Two to one, we won," Bai Bufan nodded.

As a victor, he had none of the pride of a victor; one could even see sadness in his eyes. Perhaps this was Bai Bufan's magnanimity.

"I'm not asking about the match, what was the result for you personally?" Lin Li pressed.

"I don't know about that. I have no memory of the rest of that day," Bai Bufan said.

"Still being modest, still hiding your merit and fame!" Wang Ze sighed.

"Or maybe you woke up in the hospital?" Lin Li expressed his understanding.

"So! I'm telling you!" Bai Bufan instantly broke character and roared furiously: "Tian Ji never considered the feelings of the inferior horse! Is an inferior horse not a horse? Inferior horses have horse rights too! That guy Tian Ji, he's the one who's truly horseless!"

(Translator's Note: "Horseless" / mei ma sounds like "motherless" / mei ma, a common insult).

Well-reasoned and well-founded, they had to support him.

Tian Ji was indeed too selfish.

A class is only forty minutes long, and soon, the dismissal bell rang.

After helping Wang Ze and Chen Yuying return all the equipment they had taken from the equipment room, the group headed to the school store to buy water.

"I'll talk to Teacher Xue later and use the class fund to buy a long rope and other necessary props for the fun events. Otherwise, it's too troublesome and inconvenient to borrow and return them every time," Chen Yuying said. "Lin Li, I'll probably need you to bring them in. It's easier for you to go out of the school gates."

"No problem, just tell me what you need when the time comes," Lin Li nodded indifferently, then fell into deep thought.

"What are you thinking about? Will this be troublesome for you?" Chen Yuying noticed this and asked.

But even if it was troublesome, she still wanted Lin Li to help her.

"No, it's not troublesome. I'm just wondering which shop can make fake invoices for me. I plan to buy a... no, a rope worth 13,999 yuan for everyone to jump with. Although such a rope is hard to find, our Class 4 must use the best equipment for training!

"As for me, it doesn't matter if I'm a little tired or suffer a little."

Lin Li said this with resounding force.

Chen Yuying: "..."

"Haji Lin... you guy, your mind is really full of thoughts for everyone in Class 4..." Wang Ze beside him was won over by Lin Li's charm. "Can you lend me this, no, this rope to play with after you buy it?"

"The class fund doesn't have that much money," Chen Yuying scolded with a smile.

Nansang Middle School didn't collect much for the class fund, and all expenditure details were made public. In this internet age, it was clear and concise, preventing any messy situations.

"You don't have 13,999? Then do you have 9,999? If we can't afford a 1TB rope, I can accept a 256GB one too," Lin Li didn't give up and pressed on.

"You're using TB and GB units, is that still a rope?! You're not even trying to act anymore, are you, Lin Li?! You guy! Having such thoughts now, Lin Li, your life is ruined."

Ding Sihan acted as Chen Yuying's mouthpiece, her little mouth firing off like a machine gun.

"What do you know, Xiao Ding? If I don't take it, how will the Class Rep take it? If the Class Rep doesn't take it, how will Old Jian take it? If Old Jian doesn't take it, how will Commissioner Smith take it? You can't be so selfish as a person. I'm really doing this for everyone!" Lin Li defended himself.

Ding Sihan: "..."

Ruined.

Chen Yuying sighed: "Lin Li, you are not allowed to take the civil service exam in the future. Oh, and you can't be an accountant either."

"You can rest assured about that. Don't forget, Class Rep, the Sorting Hat has already sorted me into Civil Engineering," Lin Li waved his hand.

Chen Yuying thought for a moment: "Then if you become a contractor in the future, you are not allowed to withhold workers' wages."

Lin Li: "?"

"Why are you saying this to me so seriously! Do I look like someone who would withhold workers' wages?" Lin Li got angry.

Facing Lin Li's questioning.

Xiao Ding nodded.

Xiao Qu also nodded.

Chen Yuying not only nodded but also smiled and let out an "Mhm."

When Lin Li was in despair, only Old Wang shook his head.

However, Lin Li wasn't moved. Instead, he narrowed his eyes and stared at Wang Ze: "Wang Ze, why are you shaking your head?"

If it wasn't kicking him while he was down, it was a dagger hidden in a smile.

"I think you won't be able to become a contractor. You'll only be the one having your wages withheld in this life. What right do you have to withhold others'?" Wang Ze explained.

Fuck.

I knew this guy didn't have anything good to say either.

"Sigh, being misunderstood is the inevitable fate of an outstanding person like me," Lin Li sighed sadly.

Soon, all five of them finished buying water and started heading back to the classroom.

"Lin Li, what are you looking at so sneakily?" Ding Sihan noticed Lin Li's gaze and asked.

"I've been studying the art of reading people lately to improve my social skills. I was just observing what you guys are drinking, because you can tell some social habits from this," Lin Li began to analyze: "For example—"

"Those who like to drink milk tea have many besties."

"Those who like to drink baijiu have many stories."

"Those who like to drink red wine have many lovers."

"Really? Then what about me? I like drinking this, Vitasoy Lemon Tea. What does this mean?" Ding Sihan looked at the drink in her hand and asked.

Lin Li revealed a smile that said 'you finally fell for it':

"You pee a lot."

Ding Sihan: "?"

"What about mine, Rock Sugar Pear?" Qu Wanqiu asked.

"You pee a lot."

"What about Wang Ze's Iced Black Tea?" Qu Wanqiu pointed at Wang Ze, who responded with a "man" sound to Lin Li.

"He pees a lot."

"What about Yingbao's Zhenguoli?"

"She pees a lot."

Qu Wanqiu: "..."

In a way, Lin Li was rarely this impartial.

"I'm not lying to you guys. If you don't believe me, try it yourselves," seeing everyone fall silent, Lin Li looked very innocent.

If you drink a lot, you really will pee a lot. What I said is perfectly fine, right?

Why is everyone looking at me like that?

"Lin Li! What the fuck kind of art of reading people did you learn?! You only know how to say this one sentence, don't you?! Go to hell!" Qu Wanqiu picked up her Rock Sugar Pear and threw it at Lin Li.

Lin Li caught it and threw it back to Qu Wanqiu, then looked at Wang Ze: "Wang Ze, do you want to try throwing yours too?"

Wang Ze raised his hand to indicate there was no need.

A meat bun thrown at a dog never comes back. When girls throw things at Lin Li, he's too embarrassed to keep them. But if I fucking throw this at him, I'll change my last name to Wang Haoyang if I can get it back.

Seeing that her ranged attack was ineffective, Qu Wanqiu ran up and kicked Lin Li, muttering:

"I'll show you peeing a lot! I'll show you peeing a lot!"

"Lao Qiu, this is a custom-made school uniform! One thousand eight hundred! One thousand eight hundred! And I wasn't the one who said you pee a lot, you guys did!"

"Hey! Stop kicking! Stop kicking!"

(End of Chapter)